One of my very favorite Chrisitan songs is “Oceans” by Hillsong United. From the moment I heard it playing on the radio and then in my church, I fell in love with the lyrics. I even sang it for my high school baccalaureate (yikes, that makes me feel old). It is a song that has stuck with me for a while and one that I continue to love and pray over my life.
My thoughts on my personal interpretation of this song could probably take up a hundred blog posts, but there is a specific line that I want to share with y’all that also shares a vulnerable, little piece of my heart.
“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders.”
This seemingly simple line is something I pray over my life on a daily basis: “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders.” God, I give you control over my life. I know you already have a plan for my life that will glorify you, so I give you full control. Allow me to fully trust in you no matter where you call me or when you call me. I might not know why, but help me to trust you. Take me wherever you want and allow my trust to be fully in you.
Now here is where the especially vulnerable part comes in to play. One night I was sitting in “my bed” at my host families house in Seville, Spain, where I am studying abroad for a little over three months. I sat there and silently cried. I missed my family. I missed my best friend. I was overwhelmed with trying so hard to understand and communicate a second language. I wanted to pack up my things and go home to Oklahoma even though I knew that I had already come so far during this trip.
The same thing happened to me the first time I left for college as a little freshman straight out of high school. I was terrified of being alone and away from my family. I had no idea what it would be like to live on my own. At that moment, two hours away from home seemed like a whole other world away. Now I am literally a whole other world away. 4,768 miles away from home if you want to be exact.
In those moments of fear and sadness, I had no idea why God had me in those places if I was feeling that way. Even as I prayed “spirit lead me where my trust is without borders.” Why was I praying for something like that when I was so confused at God in those moments? I am the one that told him to “lead me where my trust was without borders,” yet he was leading me, but I had no trust.
Again in my little bed in Seville, Spain, I realized that I was praying for those exact moments that scared me. I realized that these adventures are not on my own doing, but all a part of God’s plan for me. He is using me to glorify his kingdom. He is molding me into the person he has always planned for me to be. He is teaching me things I would never be able to learn in the comfort of my own home. He is calling on me to learn how to rely solely on him. He is showing me that there is so much more to this world than my own little bubble. He is teaching me what it means for my trust to be without borders and how to trust him in that way.
When I think back to the places that God has lead me to, I realize that those moments have shaped me into the person that I am today. Without those new places and lessons learned, I would be a totally different person. God does not do things just for the fun of it; He does everything for a purpose. I am incredibly thankful for those moments.
Those moments have allowed me to fully trust in my Savior. Now, when I pray “spirit lead me where my trust is without borders,” I actually mean it this time. I trust that God has a purpose for each place he brings me to, each person he introduces me to and each lesson I learn along the way. Click To Tweet